"Tomorrow isn't looking good either..." I had a teacher in high school with this sign behind her desk and frankly, it made me quite terrified to ask her much of anything. However I feel like this sign has been following me around today!! It's all I can do to take a deep breath, put one foot in front of the other, and convince myself that this isn't a permanent phase of discomfort. Although a steaming cup of Awake (2 splendas, splash of nonfat) doesn't hurt.
I'm facing a difficult decision, and either way won't really come out on top. This has to be one of the WORST feelings of failure there is. I have to choose whether to try to settle my bodily injury claim (with the insurance company of the woman who hit me in April) or file suit. The simple word "lawsuit" makes my skin crawl but worse, I really won't come out victorious in either situation. My knee still bothers me, I have good days and bad days. I have a car payment I never intended to have, medical bills, and debt from other medical bills. What I have to decide is, will taking what I can get and walking satiate the pain any less than going through the agony of litigation to get ten or fifteen thousand dollars more a year or two down the road? My answer? Probably not. Either way, I'm left with lasting anxiety every time I get behind the wheel or am a passenger in a motor vehicle. Either way, I still have nightmares that wake me up in sweats from that moment of impact and memories of losing a loved one the same way...
Who knows what the end result will be. The most valuable asset I have in all of this are the amazing friends and family that have lifted me up before, during, and through this struggle. Because no matter the kind of day I'm having, I know I can pick up the phone and have unconditional support on the other end of the line from no less than a half dozen friends and family. And that's an amazing blessing.
Onward and upward!
Ciao,
MC
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